Many attachment parenting experts, most notably Dr. Sears, recommend that you should not leave your baby with a babysitter often or for long. More importantly, however, they recommend that you not leave your baby with a stranger ever. It is believed that the feelings of abandonment a baby experiences can lead to developmental problems and attachment issues later in life.

So, how do attachment parenting advocates recommend you go about finding a sitter when you need one? You want to start out by being proactive about this from the time your baby is born, or, better yet, even before.

Know who you will want to leave your baby with when you have those occasions that call for having a sitter. Preferably, this should be a relative or close friend. In any case, it should be someone that your baby will be seeing a lot of, even before you leave him for an hour or two.

If you don’t have relatives or close friends in the area where you live, you might consider seeking out other parents who practice attachment parenting and understand the concept. Not only will you potentially find an acceptable babysitter, but you may be able to offer one another mutual help and support.

Whomever you choose to use as a babysitter, make sure that you introduce them into your child’s life well before you ever leave your baby alone with them. Allow your baby to interact with them on a significant level. The idea is that, when you do leave, you will be leaving your baby with someone she knows and trusts, having already established some history and rapport with one another.

Of course, your baby’s first interactions with a new caregiver should be with you in the room. After she has had a little time to warm up to the new person, you may consider going into the other room for a while. Of course, you should discuss this with the potential babysitter, so she has a sense of what you are doing and why. This will also give your new sitter some concept of what attachment parenting is about and why it’s important to you and your baby that a relationship is established.

Only after your baby knows the new person fairly well should you actually leave him with the new caregiver, and only for short periods of time at first. You will gradually be able to work up to longer periods.

One further note: it’s not a bad idea to find an acceptable babysitter and work on this early in your baby’s life. While we don’t want to leave our babies often or for long, there are some things in life that require it, and it’s better if you and your baby are prepared for those times from the beginning.

It can be difficult for working parents to find affordable child care. This is particularly true for single parents, who must work to support their children, and for parents who have children that are not yet of school age. Fortunately, there are many avenues that you can pursue to get financial aid to help pay for child care.

One of the biggest financial aids in paying for child care does not come as direct aid at all, it comes in the form of tax credits. There are a variety of federal and state tax credits for child care that are available to working parents, and you should familiarize yourself with these tax credits. These tax credits help in the short term, in that you can ask your employer to withhold less in taxes, and in the long term, when you get your tax return. If possible, you might consider consulting with your tax preparer ahead of time to figure out the best number of deductions to use on your paycheck.

There are also many private organizations and agencies that can help aid you financially with child care. There are some programs, particularly those run by nonprofit agencies such as the YWCA, YMCA and religious groups, that may offer a variety of scholarships and/or financial aid. In some cases these programs charge a fee based on a sliding scale that takes into account your income, as well as expenses such as housing costs and/or medical expenses.

In many areas, there may also be financial aid for child care available from state or local governments. Procedures for getting this financial aid for child care will often vary from one area to the next. You should contact your local governmental agencies, such as a child and family services agency, to see what sorts of financial aid for child care you can get in your locality.

Ultimately, the amount and type of financial aid for child care that you receive depends largely on how willing you are to ask for help. The organizations, both private and governmental, that can help provide financial aid for child care are generally very willing to help you get the most help that you qualify for.

The first time a child is left with a babysitter can often be a traumatic experience. For some children, it will be the first time that they can remember being without mom and dad. This can be extremely terrifying. Fortunately, there are things that you can do to help prepare your child to cope.

Sometimes, the solution is to simply talk it out with your child. Discuss what exactly she is afraid of; if she is afraid that, while you are out, the bogeyman will get her, help her understand that there is no bogeyman. By giving you details of her exact fear, she often will realize by herself that it isn’t necessarily rational or real.

If your child is particularly apprehensive, you can do a trial run. Hire your babysitter to come and watch your child while you are home. Stay nearby but out of immediate sight, such as in a den, bedroom, or office. Explain to your child that you will be in the house, but that she should go to the babysitter for anything that she needs for the next hour or so. This also gives you an opportunity to observe your babysitter’s skills.

It is also important to be confident with your child about the babysitter. If you are nervous and apprehensive about leaving them with a babysitter, they will also be nervous and apprehensive. Much as animals can “smell” fear, your child will also know if you are afraid to leave her alone. Display your trust in the babysitter, so that your children can trust her too.

You should also try to be upbeat with your child about the babysitter. If you are sad and act as though you will never see your little one again, she will pick up on it. On the other hand, if you are casual about it or sneak off while she’s involved in an activity, this can create other problems. Instead, smile and hug your child; explain to her that you will be out for a while, but that when you get home you will come into their room while they are sleeping and give them a goodnight kiss. Make it a cheerful and quick goodbye.

Try to make time with the babysitter a fun time. Talk with the child and the babysitter ahead of time about some of the fun things that they can do together, such as playing games. The excitement about having play time with the babysitter can lessen your little one’s anxiety about not having you around for a short time.

The first time a child is left with a babysitter can often be a traumatic experience. For some children, it will be the first time that they can remember being without mom and dad. This can be extremely terrifying. Fortunately, there are things that you can do to help prepare your child to cope.

Sometimes, the solution is to simply talk it out with your child. Discuss what exactly she is afraid of; if she is afraid that, while you are out, the bogeyman will get her, help her understand that there is no bogeyman. By giving you details of her exact fear, she often will realize by herself that it isn’t necessarily rational or real.

If your child is particularly apprehensive, you can do a trial run. Hire your babysitter to come and watch your child while you are home. Stay nearby but out of immediate sight, such as in a den, bedroom, or office. Explain to your child that you will be in the house, but that she should go to the babysitter for anything that she needs for the next hour or so. This also gives you an opportunity to observe your babysitter’s skills.

It is also important to be confident with your child about the babysitter. If you are nervous and apprehensive about leaving them with a babysitter, they will also be nervous and apprehensive. Much as animals can “smell” fear, your child will also know if you are afraid to leave her alone. Display your trust in the babysitter, so that your children can trust her too.

You should also try to be upbeat with your child about the babysitter. If you are sad and act as though you will never see your little one again, she will pick up on it. On the other hand, if you are casual about it or sneak off while she’s involved in an activity, this can create other problems. Instead, smile and hug your child; explain to her that you will be out for a while, but that when you get home you will come into their room while they are sleeping and give them a goodnight kiss. Make it a cheerful and quick goodbye.

Try to make time with the babysitter a fun time. Talk with the child and the babysitter ahead of time about some of the fun things that they can do together, such as playing games. The excitement about having play time with the babysitter can lessen your little one’s anxiety about not having you around for a short time.

We’ve all seen the horror reports on the news; hidden cameras blowing a babysitter’s cover, exposing their evil deeds and witnessing the appalling treatment dealt out to youngsters. It needn’t be that way. As a parent, it is your responsibility to be vigilant about whom you choose to care for your child when you’re not there.

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